Default Open Mouth

There are various types of people in this world. Some are old, some are young, some are hairy, some are cannibals and some are just gay. I am going to talk about a certain type of person that I would like to refer to as someone with Default Open Mouth Syndrome or DOM's.

Recently, my wife came into contact with a DOM and I just saw one walking down the street which inspired me to write about them. I feel as though two sightings of anything that bizarre should be documented. (so if another rappers mom dies while getting cosmetic surgery this week...I will write about that as well. too soon?)

Most people when returning to their default facial position have their mouths closed. DOM's are people who in their natural state have their mouth open. I am not sure what causes this, but it is perplexing. I have questions that need answers people!

1. Do they often get soar throats?

2. How many bugs do they swallow on an annual basis?

3. Are they as stupid as they look? (Because they look stupid)

4. How is the government involved?

5. If one DOM marries another DOM, do they have DOM babies?

6. What is the cause of this annoying abnormality?

7. If supposedly an average person swallows eight spiders a year in their sleep, then...well you know the rest of the question

8. Why did the movie Premonition look really cool and then totally suck?

If you don't know what I'm talking about and have never come across a DOM before, do me a favor. Look in the mirror, slightly open your mouth, after about ten seconds press your lips together slowly to swallow, but after swallowing, return back to the slightly opened mouth position (and try not to drool)

Hmm...now don't you look stupid. Don't be a Dumb DOM like this baby.